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Category Archives: Poetry

If Santa Was a Redneck

20-Nov-06
Redneck Santa

If Santa was a redneck
He’d prob’ly still be kind
Though putting children on his knee
Would not be wise of mind

If Santa was a redneck
His way of spreading cheer
Wouldn’t be with gifts by sleigh
But by Chevy full of beer

If Santa was a redneck
The chimney he’d forego
And leave the beer out on the porch
Where the frigerator goes

If Santa was a redneck
No cookies would we leave
Just a can of Copenhagen
He could roll up in his sleeve

If Santa was a redneck
We’d know it when he came
The belching, scratching, passing gas
There’d be no one else to blame

If Santa was a redneck
Christmas day would be a blast
We’d all sit out upon the porch
And pass around the Pabst